Riot’s Reviews: Fast X
Twenty-two years?! It has been nearly twenty-two years since we were introduced to the Toretto family and their band of VCR robbing antiheros. To put this timeline into perspective, when the original movie was released Apple was selling the very first iPod, obtaining a cellphone or a flat screen T.V. was a status symbol, and America was about to be rocked by the most significant terrorist attack in its history. For the Fast and Furious crew, we’ve watched them grow in number, consistently defy gravity/physics, and come back from the dead more times than comic book heroes. Audiences have come to expect a certain amount of insanity from the franchise, with the ninth installation setting the bar pretty high by shooting a car into freakin’ space! But with first-time F+F director Louis Leterrier behind the camera, would there be a return to the roots of the series? Or would the writers/creators keep pushing the against the threshold of reason?
It’s the latter obviously (I’ll get to that later). I would argue the general sentiment amongst F+F fans would be a desire to calm things down a bit. The highest ranked films in the series have storylines that allow for the suspension of belief but still remain somewhat grounded (like Fast Five and Furious 7). Sure, it’s asinine to believe that a group of street racers would grow to essentially become international spies. But when you add a few larger-than-life personalities like Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham into the mix, it’s a little bit easier to swallow. Keeping around familiar faces, developing a core group of characters, and allowing audiences to empathize with their personalities helps make twenty-two years not feel so long.
Unfortunately, Fast X seemingly learns nothing from its higher quality predecessors. The driving sequences are excessively drawn out and often replaced by awful-looking CGI. Granted, I’d rather not see thousand year old Roman architecture destroyed, but even a casual visitor of the city understands film’s main chase scene doesn’t make sense. They continued resurrecting characters from the dead, undermining so much of what made other characters’ development meaningful. They added a slew of new faces that were neither impactful or worthwhile (holy hell, please stop casting Pete Davidson already, I don’t care if it’s a cameo). At the end of the day, there are far better ways to give credit to the faces that made the franchise than an endless string of unwanted/unnecessary cameos.
Much like the previous films, Fast X is filled with ill-timed and poorly delivered comedy bits, particularly from Tyrese Gibson and Ludacris. Its new antagonist, an admittedly clever retcon, in Jason Mamoa swings wildly from being reasonably intimidating to outright silly/flamboyant in all the wrong ways. It was like watching him attempt to smash Jack Sparrow and Heath Ledger’s Joker into his own personality and praying that what came out the other end was sensical. Surprisingly, his addition still ended up being my favorite thing about the film, which says a lot considering the sheer amount of negative aspects. The Fast and Furious franchise feels as tired as many of these actors are starting to look and who could blame them? Twenty-two years and they’re still not done!!! A series of open-ended cliff hangers to close the film did nothing to whet the appetite for more. If anything, you’re left wondering if it’s even worth seeing it wrap up.
Fast X is another lesson on what it’s like to be your own worst enemy. For every decent fight scene (including a well-timed F-U from John Cena and a fantastic brawl between Michelle Rodriguez and Charlize Theron) there are seven other shots that completely take you out of the movie (Vin Diesel flipping a car with one hand for instance). It’s oversaturated in all the worst ways and might as well link up with the actual MCU at this point because it suffers from all of the same issues that Marvel does. If you can’t give legitimate risk and consequences to your characters, the meaningful conflict dries out and interest wanes. It’s okay to keep your characters in the afterlife and it’s okay to leave the “comedy” at the door (“meta” is stupid, stop it).
Riot’s Rating: 5.5/10: If you’ve seen them all so far, I doubt this review will stop you from seeing this one. Keep those expectations low and you’ll still be disappointed though. My advice, wait for the stream. It’ll be there shortly.
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